Every now and then it seems like there are reoccurring themes at work. Like one week everyone has bowel obstructions. Or I'll do like 5 bladder irrigations (you don't want to know what that entails, men!) in a given week and then not again for a year. Recently I feel like my reoccurring theme has been young heroin users.
A girl in her early 20s with extensive skin abscesses who is barely conscious, but whose driver's license picture tells me used to be very pretty. The young woman we have to sedate to cut pus and tar out of her thighs - the aftermath of desperation to get high after all your veins have been shot. And the young man who would've died had the paramedics arrived too much later with the narc blocker. His mom weeping and saying he was so blue- but sounding all too high herself.
This addiction is the ultimate empty promise. By giving you momentary bouts of extreme pleasure it robs you of your ability to experience pleasure without it. It makes you feel free until you wake up a slave. The ordinary enjoyments of life suddenly seem bland and flat, and the stressors completely unmanageable. You soar high into the sky and then find yourself battered and broken on the ground with ashes and burns where once you had wings.
Most people know that drugs are bad for you. The problem is we all have too much faith in ourselves. We are sure we can give up whatever destruction we hold before it has a chance to hurt us. We are strong enough, we can quit whenever we want. But too often we go to throw the dynamite and find its been glued to our hand.
A girl in her early 20s with extensive skin abscesses who is barely conscious, but whose driver's license picture tells me used to be very pretty. The young woman we have to sedate to cut pus and tar out of her thighs - the aftermath of desperation to get high after all your veins have been shot. And the young man who would've died had the paramedics arrived too much later with the narc blocker. His mom weeping and saying he was so blue- but sounding all too high herself.
This addiction is the ultimate empty promise. By giving you momentary bouts of extreme pleasure it robs you of your ability to experience pleasure without it. It makes you feel free until you wake up a slave. The ordinary enjoyments of life suddenly seem bland and flat, and the stressors completely unmanageable. You soar high into the sky and then find yourself battered and broken on the ground with ashes and burns where once you had wings.
Most people know that drugs are bad for you. The problem is we all have too much faith in ourselves. We are sure we can give up whatever destruction we hold before it has a chance to hurt us. We are strong enough, we can quit whenever we want. But too often we go to throw the dynamite and find its been glued to our hand.
Ahhhh....memories of our times together doing bladder irrigation. :) Fun times!
ReplyDeleteHaha! I always think of you! I jinxed myself with this post- I immediately got my first irrigation in months!
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